Surviving Infidelity

Surviving InfidelityFinding out that your spouse is having an affair can be one of the most devastating revelations that you will have to deal with. Surviving infidelity in your marriage is very achievable but it will require hard work and perseverance from both parties. In fact, the cheating spouse will have to proof his or her commitment to the marriage and he or she must be willing to answer and discuss any reasonable questions that may be directed at them by the cheated spouse.

 Surviving Infidelity - What Everyone Needs To Now ?

Take heart in the fact that it is normal to have a variety of negative emotions raging within yourself. Most spouses make the mistake of trying to talk about the affair in the early stages after the affair was exposed. This will only lead to even more negative feelings and will in no way help anybody to cope or to move forward. Communication is indeed a vital part in the process, but at a later stage.

Please bear in mind that the first discussion will be the most difficult and can easily get out of hand. You will feel the need to vent, but do try and keep it civil. Both partners will have to be able to approach this subject in a calm, composed and rational manner and it is therefore advised not to attempt this discussion early on, rather wait until you both had time to work through your feelings and thoughts.

Marriage Counseling

A lot of infidelity victims also immediately consult with marriage counselors because they are totally terrified and don't know how to deal with the images in their minds. The thought that your spouse don't love you anymore as well as the feelings of worthlessness and insecurity can be a terrible burden to bear alone.

Many couples just do not have the necessary skills to try and work through the affair and even if they do, it is still not wise to approach this alone. Because of the intense emotional trauma, couples can easily become loss in what has happened and this will seriously affect their chances to survive the affair. The early stages of dealing with an affair will be the cornerstone on which couples will build. 

This is where marriage counseling can play a huge role in your success towards healing your marriage. Surviving infidelity through counseling will enable both parties to talk about the affair in a productive manner.

Take Action Now

Just because your partner was having an affair, does not mean that this is the end of your marriage. Believe it or not, but the future of your marriage is now in your hands. It is up to you to decide if you want to save your marriage. If you feel your marriage is worth fighting for, you owe it to yourself to at least try. If you are concerned about marriage counseling costs then I have good news - the surviving infidelity course is an exceptional one that assists both parties to not only come to terms with what has happened but to also deal with all the different areas of concern and conflict without the expensive price tag of normal marriage counseling sessions

If you are the cheating spouse, you need to make a choice and you need to make it now. Continuing with an affair is harmful to both you and your spouse and if you have any intention of saving your marriage, you need to come clean and start the healing process. 

Here are some highlights of the surviving infidelity course :

Phase 1 :

Step 1:  Getting in Touch with Your Pain

This is where you should start and even though it may seem counterintuitive you have to get in touch with your emotions. This will probably be the last thing that you would want to do if you are the victim of the affair. Your first reaction will probably be to stop the emotions and feelings that are plaguing you - this will be the wrong course of action.

You can neither hide nor run away from your feelings, you just have to go through it. You will most likely face some or all of the following emotions :

Betrayal
Guilt
Disappointment
Paranoid Feelings
Frustration
Fear
Vengefulness
Anger

The process of defining your emotional reactions will have a positive and empowering effect that will greatly help you to overcome these difficult emotions so that you can heal. You have to know what you are feeling before you can actively process and cope with these feelings :

Step 2:  How to Effectively Process the Painful Emotions 

You will need to learn new ways to cope with these emotions in order for them not to consume you or disrupt your live completely. This emergency toolkit is the key to unlocking your ability to cope with these emotions.

The following skills are part of this toolkit and is described in detail on page 22 of the course.

Distracting yourself
Breathing
Taking care of yourself
Getting out of the house or office
Exercising
Talking it out with a friend

Step 3 : Surviving Infidelity - Clear Your Mind and Own Your Thoughts 

In order to clear your mind, you need to do more than just cope with your emotions. It is also necessary to know how to deal with your irrational negative thoughts in order for you to take control of your mind. Take note that these two processes are linked : thinking will lead to feeling and feeling will lead to thinking. You need to address both if you wish to overcome the pain that you are currently experiencing.

Dr. Gunzburg will provide you with a 3 part method in section 2, that will help you to take control of your thoughts and you will therefore feel less unstable and insecure.

On page 27 of section 2, you will learn how to use a 3 step process that will enable you to clear your mind.

First Step  : Tracking your thoughts.

Second Step : Challenging your thoughts.

Third Step : The use of self-affirmations.

After you have established the identity of these negative thoughts, you will quickly learn how to challenge them by validating their believability to see how realistic they really are. You will also be able to develop a counter-attack against them by making use of facts.

Once this is achieved, you will have the knowledge to develop these thoughts into more realistic and rational positive affirmations. You can now use these self-affirmations to confirm what you know is the truth and to set yourself free from the negative thoughts when they do occur.     

Step 4 : How to Deal with The Obsessive Images In Your Mind  

This is by far one of the most challenging problems to overcome when you are faced with the haunting images that keep on popping up. These images can be anything related to the affair such as imagining your partner in bed with another woman or man or it can even be a specific song that remind you of the affair

Dr. Gunzburg will quickly help you to cope with them and also help you to disable the mechanisms that allow them to overpower you. This is not pie in the sky tactics, it is based on cognitive-behavioral psychology science. You will be introduced to very powerful and effective visualization exercises.

There are just too many sections in this program to list here but you are welcome to find out more about the surviving infidelity course by clicking the link below. 

Get More Information On this Course - Click Here     

 

 

 

 

 

Survive The Affair

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